Di First Places to Live

Humble heart, humble heart, humble heart, and to know yourself

Lesson One: Picture of di Soul

Saint Teresa start her book Castle Wey Dey Inside with this description of di soul:

I begin think of di soul as if na castle wey dem make from one single diamond or from crystal wey clear well-well, wey get plenty rooms inside, just as plenty mansions [places to live] dey for Heaven (I.I #2).

She present this picture of castle as something wey she receive from our Lord earlier that morning, as she dey pray to understand how she go write, under obedience, about wetin she understand concerning di inner life of prayer and union with God. Di castle na di person soul. Inside that castle, plenty places to live dey. All these places connect to one another and lead to di place for di centre where God Himself dey live.

For di pages wey follow, Saint Teresa carry her readers for journey go inside, reach di centre of this “castle wey dem make from one single diamond.” This castle no be something wey we suppose stand outside dey look; instead, our main mission must be to enter and live for di centre of that beautiful castle wey dem make from one single diamond. This journey carry us pass through countless other places inside until we reach di centre. There for di centre, di soul meet di great King, God Himself, for way wey make His presence clear and change di soul.

Reflection: Think deeply about your own soul today. How you dey see yourself?  Plenty times, we dey fear to look inside ourselves with prayer. If you do am, wetin you go discover? Very often, when we look inside our souls, we dey see di sin and dirt of wetin we don do, and we dey see di weaknesses wey we dey struggle with every day. But na that be who you be? Na only all your faults and weaknesses put together you be? Na only all di sins wey you don commit put together you be?

True-true, Saint Teresa go soon talk about how terrible sin be, especially mortal sin, and she go reflect on how much sin dey dirty di soul. But she start with this picture of castle wey dey inside where God dey live, because na this first show who we really be. Our souls be like this diamond castle wey money no fit buy, no be because of wetin we don do, but because of di One wey dem create us for His image. God make us for His likeness and image, and nothing fit ever take that one away.

King wey get glory pass all, You make me for Your divine image, and You want make my soul shine bright like diamond, wey dey sparkle for di bright Sun wey dey shine from inside. Give me di grace to look inside myself and see You wey dey live inside. As I dey begin this journey, help me make I no see only my sin, so that I fit see myself as You create me. As I dey do so, help me also see di sin wey dey darken di brightness of this castle wey be my soul.

Most Holy Trinity wey dey live inside me, I love You, I trust You, I surrender my life to You.

Lesson Two: Di Beauty of di Soul and Wetin E Fit Hold

As Saint Teresa continue to think deeply about this picture of di soul, she explain say nothing fit properly show di great beauty of di soul or how much e fit receive.

Now, my sisters, if we think about this thing well, di soul of di righteous person na nothing else but paradise, where, as God tell us, He dey find His delight. How una think say room go be, if na there King wey mighty so, wey wise so, wey pure so, and wey full of everything wey good, dey find His delight? I no fit find anything wey I fit compare with di great beauty of soul and how much e fit receive (I.I #2).

For Saint Teresa, di soul beautiful pass wetin person fit understand, because God make am for His image and likeness, and e fit receive so much because God dey live deep inside am. If God wey His beauty no get end dey live inside each soul, then this fact alone lift di soul reach level wey words no fit describe. God call di soul itself to share for His life wey no get end—no be because of di soul own merits, but because na so God plan am. Na from this point we must start, and we must never forget am.

Reflection: Think deeply about these realities wey no get limit. First, think deeply about di beauty of your own soul. Your soul beautiful reach level wey person no fit understand, because God make am for His likeness and image. Even though sin truly dey cover that beauty like cloud, nothing fit ever change wetin your soul really be. From di moment wey God create you, through all eternity, your soul go remain beautiful forever. To understand this truth, you need di honesty wey humble heart dey bring. Humble heart na gift wey dey allow you see yourself as God dey see you. Humble heart wey dey accept truth go help you understand more clearly who you be for God eye.

Secondly, think well about how much your soul fit contain. Since God dey dwell inside you, na the One wey no get limit dey live inside you. Because of this, your soul fit contain Him wey no get limit only if e fit contain God wey no get limit. No be anything wey you do earn this; instead, na so your very being be. God make your soul for such way wey He dey invite you to spend this life and continue for eternity, as you dey enter deeper and deeper into the innermost dwelling place of your soul, where you go encounter the life of God wey dey live inside you. If you allow yourself understand this truth, e go bring humility to your mind and heart, and e go give you strong desire to discover God wey no get limit and wey dey inside you.

God wey beautiful pass all and wey no get limit, help me discover You for the very depth of my being. Help me see You, know You and love You, wey dey there for the deepest inner dwelling place of my soul. Clear the mud from my eyes and the dirt from my ears, so that I go come know You, love You, and become one with You, wey create me for Your most holy image.

Most Holy Trinity wey dey dwell inside me, I love You, I trust You, I surrender my life to You.

Lesson Three: Di Place to Stay Wey Dey Deepest Inside

The soul, wey we see like castle wey dem make from one single diamond wey get great beauty and fit contain plenty, na also castle where discovery no dey ever end. Every dwelling place inside this castle of your soul na place wey you suppose discover as you dey journey towards the centre.

Make we now imagine say this castle, as I don talk, get plenty mansions [dwelling places], some dey up, others dey down, others dey for each side; and for the centre and middle of all of them, na there the most important mansion [dwelling place] dey, where the most secret things dey happen between God and the soul (I.I #4).

The goal of each person na to reach the “most important dwelling place,” where the soul go rest for the presence of God, wey dey fully reveal Himself there. But each soul dey journey, by God’s grace, towards the innermost dwelling place through different ways. Even though the paths we dey follow resemble each other, each one dey unique to each of us.

One of the main goals of spiritual life na to explore the many dwelling places inside your own soul, like person wey dey journey to discover things. We no suppose stay for one dwelling place for long time. Instead, we must dey free to discover one room after another, as we dey always move closer and closer to the room for the centre. This journey must never stop until we reach the innermost room for the centre and rest completely for God.

Reflection: Think well about this beautiful truth: God dey call you to go deeper. Too many times for life, we dey too satisfied with where we dey, and we “no dey move again” for our inner journey towards God. Too many times, year after year, we dey remain for the outer courtyard of the castle of our soul, or for one room inside, as the many noises and voices from outside wey dey struggle to get our attention take over our whole mind.

You dey willing to begin this journey to the centre of your soul? You dey willing to begin explore the inner dwelling places wey go take you closer and closer to God, wey His beauty and love no get limit? You get desire for this exploration and discovery?

Heaven na that final destination, but we fit seek Heaven here and now. Why you go wait? Why you go live for the many outer dwelling places where you no fit see God’s presence clearly because something dey cover am? Why you no begin the journey and seek Him with all your heart? Na safe journey. Na journey to the centre of your very own soul. Na journey where dem dey invite you to meet your God wey dey dwell inside you.

My God wey dey hidden and full of glory, help me begin my journey. Many times, the countless obstacles and sins wey I dey face every day dey distract me. Help me begin turn my eyes to You, wey dey wait for me for the depth of my very being. Help me trust You and begin this glorious journey inside me.

Most Holy Trinity wey dey dwell inside me, I love You, I trust You, I surrender my life to You.

Lesson Four: “Worms Wey Dey Smell Bad”

Wetin be “worm wey dey smell bad?” Na worm wey get bad smell, wey no pleasant at all, and wey dey touch person deeply. Apart from the way Saint Teresa dey talk about our souls as beautiful diamond or as something wey no get limit to wetin e fit contain, she also dey refer to each of us as one of these worms.

…e no go do us any harm to discover say, for this our exile, e dey possible for God wey great like this to share close fellowship with worms wey dey smell bad like this, and to love Him for His great goodness and mercy wey no get limit (I.I #4).

This one no be contradiction? How we fit be fine castle wey dem build with diamond and still be worm wey dey smell bad? To understand this one, e dey important to look the context. Saint Teresa dey talk about our souls like this to stress the truth about God mercy. She explain say make we think deeply about the countless ways wey God dey give us and other people His graces. She explain say person need great humility to see how God dey give His countless graces. And if we understand say nothing wey we fit do by our own power make us worthy at all, and say we no deserve anything apart from the fate of worm wey dey smell bad, then we go dey ready to thank God forever. We go stand in wonder as we see how God get mercy reach, as He dey give us so much for this our “exile” away from Heaven.

Time to Reflect: You dey see God grace and mercy as dem dey work for your life? You fit see this thing? Your heart dey attentive to the reality of mercy?

Many times, we no dey see God mercy as e dey work, even though e dey all around us. Instead, we dey fix our mind on sin, hurt, division, scandal, and many other things for life wey dey stir people feelings. Our constant goal must be to adjust the way our hearts dey see, so that we fit focus on God mercy wey dey work for our world and our souls.

One way to see God mercy more clearly na to compare am with the wretched condition of our souls. If pride make you believe say na only you righteous, or make your heart dey judge other people, you no go fit see God mercy wey dey present in abundance. But if you fit see the pitiful weakness of our world wey don fall into sin, together with the lowly condition of your own soul, then you go fit see more easily how God dey enter this weakness and misery with His love and grace.

You be worm wey dey smell bad, but even for that condition, God love for you no get limit. To understand say God love you, no matter who you be or wetin you don do, na the first step to understand more deeply who God be. Na Mercy Itself He be.

My God wey get mercy in abundance, I thank You for Your love, I thank You for Your mercy wey no get limit. Open my eyes make I see more clearly who I be and how deep Your love for me be. I no worthy of Your love for me, but You still dey give me this love in overflowing abundance. Give me eyes too to see You as You dey work for the lives of all the people around me. Help me make I continue to rejoice for Your Mercy towards dem and to join You for giving that mercy.

Most Holy Trinity wey dey dwell inside me, I love You, I trust You, I surrender my life to You.

Lesson Five: To “Dey” Inside di Castle

Since the Most Holy Trinity dey dwell for the deepest dwelling place inside the soul, na your mission to enter there. But so that you no go confuse about wetin e mean to enter your own soul, Saint Teresa give this explanation:

E be like say na nonsense I dey talk, because if this castle na the soul, then e clear say the question of us entering am no suppose arise at all. Because na we ourselves be the castle: and e no go make sense to tell person make e enter room when e don already dey inside! But you must understand say many ways dey to “dey” for one place (I.I #7).

“Many ways dey to ‘dey’ for one place.” Na this be the key. Imagine say you get one big, fine castle, but you never enjoy all the rooms. Instead, na only for the veranda or the first room inside you dey spend time. Imagine say, after you don get that castle for many years, person ask you wetin dey for the remaining part of the castle, and you have to answer, “I no know; I never go there!”

Even though e hard to imagine this kind thing, na exactly wetin most people dey do with their souls. Dem no dey enter inside to explore the deep places and beauty within, so that dem fit discover the hidden treasure of God wey dey live inside dem. Instead of just to “dey” for the courtyard outside or the first room, God dey draw you enter the bridal room to share close fellowship with the Blessed Trinity.

Time to Reflect: Today, think deeply about how much you know about your soul. You dey behave more like visitor or like the main person wey dey live there? Na only things for outside dey occupy you, or you know the deep details of your castle?

The first step to enter deeper into this castle of your soul na to acknowledge say plenty things dey wey you never explore. When you humbly admit say you never know yourself well like this, e go help move you to enter deeper.

The second step na to make firm choice to continue the journey wey dey go inside you. With prayer, choose to enter the next “room” and spend time there, as you dey seek to understand the divine presence and beauty wey you never notice reach now. From there, commit yourself to continue to explore the rooms wey dey inside you, so you go dey move closer and closer to that inner room wey dey the centre. All the rooms connect to one another. So, the only way to reach the centre na to move from one room enter another.

My God wey hide well-well, draw me closer to You so that I go fit continue to enter deeper into the light of Your divine presence wey full of glory beyond measure. Today, I choose to start my journey afresh. Fill me with joy and peace as I dey discover You, wey dey wait for me for the deepest part of my soul.

Most Holy Trinity wey dey dwell inside me, I love You, I trust You, I surrender my life to You.

Lesson Six: Di Gate of True Prayer

Saint Teresa explain say “souls wey no dey pray be like people wey their body or hands and legs no fit move.”  Dem dey always keep themselves busy “with things wey dey outside.” This na sad experience, but e dey happen well-well. Almost everything wey we dey spend time on every day na to keep ourselves “busy” and take up the small attention wey we get. The noise wey dey come from the outside world all the time dey take over our mind. Because of this, we no dey enjoy the peaceful rest wey dey wait for us, if only we go enter deeper into our souls to meet God for His presence. Wetin be the remedy?  Na prayer:

As far as I fit understand, the door wey person go pass enter this castle na prayer and meditation: I no mean prayer inside mind instead of prayer wey person dey say with mouth, because if na prayer at all, meditation must follow am (I.I #9).

The prayer wey Saint Teresa dey talk about no be just to “say” prayers. Many times, people dey go church, recite prayers before dem chop or for night, but dem no really pray at all. For prayer to be prayer, Saint Teresa talk say “meditation must follow am.” This mean say, for inside our heart, we must really pay attention to the meaning and mystery of wetin we dey talk or think deeply about. Meditation na the “gate” wey lead to the beginning of prayer, and so, na the gate to the castle of our souls.

True prayer na communication with God. But e must also be holy communication. Sometimes, the way we dey talk to God be like say na our slave He be, instead of God. We dey come meet God with demands, dey tell Am wetin we want make He do for us. If He no give us wetin we demand, we go vex. This no be true prayer.

True prayer dey happen when we know Who we dey communicate with, and who we be in relation to Am. Na God He be, the Almighty, pure Mercy Itself. We na sinners—we weak, we dey confused, and we need God for everything. The purpose of our life na to know God, love Am, and give Am glory by responding to Am as the King of our souls. Na only when we get this right attitude towards God we go fit begin to pray.

Reflection: You dey pray? To ask am more clearly, you dey do meditation? This mean say, you don ever even enter the castle of your soul? You fit point to one time wey you do so through some time wey you spend for true prayer?

Even though this book na about spiritual life and prayer, to read about spiritual life no go ever take the place of actually praying. Through study, we fit learn about God, but na for prayer we dey meet God and encounter His living and true presence inside us.

Think about one time for your past when you really pray. Maybe na for retreat, or one time for your church during Eucharistic adoration. Maybe before now, you get the habit of praying every day for house, inside the silence of your room.

If you fit remember one time when you truly pray, beyond just to recite some prayers, then commit yourself to return to this practice every day. If you already dey spend time to pray every day, then think about how you fit go deeper. Try to do meditation during your prayer every day. Take one particular prayer or one passage from the Gospels. Think deeply about am, try to enter the scene, allow am draw you inside, seek God’s presence, and no fear to sit down for silence as you dey experience God’s loving presence.

God wey Your glory pass all, I desire to pray every day. When things distract me or the concerns of life take over my mind, help me to settle my mind and turn to You through prayer and meditation. Make I learn how to do meditation. Make I discover this practice of prayer, so that I no go only meet You for my thoughts or talk to You with my lips, but I go also surrender my will to You. Make I do so with all the strong desire of my soul, so that I go fit learn to love You for prayer.

Most Holy Trinity wey dey dwell inside me, I love You, I trust You, I surrender my life to You.

Lesson Seven: To Enter through di Door

How deep prayer fit go no get end. God dey call us make we dey go deeper and deeper, dey grow for communion with our God wey be Trinity. But to go deep, we need to start first. For here, Saint Teresa dey talk about person wey just start to pray:

As one thousand things don full their mind, dem dey pray only few times for one month. Most times, na those things dem dey think about all the time, because their mind hold those things tight; and where their treasure dey, na there their heart dey too (I.I #10).

She continue to point out say “from time to time” this person dey enter the castle through prayer. And even though na only small dem manage enter, and even though “one thousand reptiles” follow dem enter, this person “don do plenty good by even entering at all.” This one mean say, as we begin to pray and meditate with sincere heart, e dey likely say we no go see say we don change completely and dey pray like the saints. But even so, even if na only small we dey pray and meditate, even if na only few times for one month, this one good, and we must understand say na the first step wey we really need to take.

Reflection: One of the things wey matter pass for prayer na simply to pray. You dey pray at least few times every month? If na so, that one good. But if na only that level you give yourself to prayer, e no go ever carry you very deep. Prayer must become steady habit wey you give yourself to with all your heart. When you dey pray, things dey distract you or occupy your mind? Wetin dey distract you? Wetin dey occupy your mind so much wey e dey hard you to focus? Put those distractions aside, stop to dey give excuses, and make up your mind to live life of prayer.

Think well about how you don give yourself to praying every day. Try arrange timetable for prayer. The best thing na to set aside the same length of time every day for prayer. Find quiet place where you fit do this one. Start with at least ten minutes, but more time go better. No dey give God time wey no reach. Make plan for that prayer time and follow am well. Even if e be like say the prayer no dey bear fruit, still hold on. Make up your mind to learn how to pray and to pray every day. You go discover say, as you give yourself to prayer and remain faithful, you don fit enter through the door of the castle of your soul. Once you enter, you go wonder at all the things wey dey there for you to discover as you dey journey go the centre where God dey dwell.

My Lord wey get patience, I don choose many things wey dey occupy my mind for this life instead of You. I no don dey faithful to prayer every day. Today, I don make up my mind to change. I don make up my mind to learn how to meditate on You. I promise to put distractions aside any time dem come. I promise to overcome the weakness of my will, so that I no go ever fail to love and adore You for prayer every day.

Most Holy Trinity wey dey dwell inside me, I love You, I trust You, I surrender my life to You.

Lesson Eight: Wetin Mortal Sin Dey Cause

As Saint Teresa continue to reflect on the soul wey dey live inside the first dwelling places, she pause to think about the frightening reality of mortal sin.

No darkness wey thick pass this one dey, and anything wey dark and black still dey far less dark and black than this one. Na only one thing you need to know about am—that even though the Sun Himself, wey give the soul all im splendour and beauty, still dey there for the centre of the soul, as far as the soul sharing in Him dey concerned, e be as if He no dey there, even though the soul still fit enjoy Him just as crystal fit reflect the sun (I.II #1).

E important to understand say e always dey possible for us to commit mortal sin. So, to understand how the soul dey become “dark” and “black” because of mortal sin na help wey we really need to overcome temptations wey dey lead to serious sin. No be say God no dey dwell inside again; rather, na say the room for the centre of the soul, where the Most Holy Trinity dey dwell, don cover completely, so that the person no fit encounter Him wey dey dwell inside. Grace dey disappear with mortal sin, but God still dey present inside us by His essence, dey keep us in existence. But communion with our loving God don cut off, and the soul remain for darkness.

Advice two wey Saint Teresa give be like this: First, if you fit understand clearly wetin mortal sin dey cause, then holy fear of offending God go begin fill your heart. You must no ever fear God Himself, even when you commit serious sin. But you must fear to dey inside the condition of mortal sin. Total darkness, separation from God, to no fit do anything wey get spiritual merit, to lose direction, confusion, and other things like these, na things wey you suppose fear well-well and use all the power of your soul to avoid. Second, when you understand wetin mortal sin dey cause—that is, say soul wey dey that condition no fit do anything wey go please God and benefit the soul—humility go begin grow. In particular, the soul fit come understand say every good action wey come from inside am come only from God. God na the spring of living water, and without that water, na only death fit dey. But when person turn to the water of grace, new life go begin spring up from inside am.

Reflection: Try understand how serious and terrible mortal sin be. If you never commit mortal sin, no deceive yourself to think say you no fit commit am. Try make holy fear grow inside you, no be only fear of mortal sin, but fear of every sin. We must hate sin, make e repel us, despise am, and make firm decision say we no go ever commit am. The problem be say sin dey entice and deceive person. Nobody dey sin because dem want make their life miserable. Dem dey sin because dem believe the lie say this or that action go satisfy dem. Even though sin go always give some kind satisfaction wey no deep and wey no dey last, e dey always end for emptiness and destruction inside the soul. If you fit discover the truth about how terrible sin be, especially mortal sin, then always dey ready to remember this terrible thing anytime temptation come, so that you go fit reject that temptation with great strength.

Still reflect on this truth: if you remain firmly rooted for God’s grace and mercy, then all the good wey you dey do get their source for that grace and mercy. To humbly understand this go help free you from pride. Use the picture wey Saint Teresa use of tree wey dem plant near spring of pure water, and wey sunlight dey shine all over. Without the water and the sun, the tree no fit grow and e no fit produce any good fruit. Na so e still be with us: without God, we no fit do anything good. Hold on to that truth wey dey teach humility, and allow am make plenty gratitude grow inside your heart as you point to the source of all the good wey you dey do.

My Lord wey dey forgive, when I sin, I dey cover the beauty of my soul with dirt. When this happen, You no fit shine through my soul, and I no fit shine brightly with Your light. Abeg, give me holy hatred for every sin, so that sin go continue to repel me. Help me still acknowledge You with humility as the source of every good thing for my life, so that I go fit give You my deepest gratitude and glory.

Most Holy Trinity wey dey dwell inside me, I love You, I trust You, I surrender my life to You.

Lesson Nine: To Know Yourself through Humility

As soon as Saint Teresa finish her short teaching about mortal sin, she turn her attention to wetin she describe as the most important virtue wey person fit get: humility.

…to know yourself dey so important that, even if dem lift you right up to heaven, I go like make you no ever relax for the effort wey you dey make to grow for this knowledge; as long as we dey this earth, nothing dey more important for us pass humility. So I repeat say na very good thing—excellent thing, true-true—to begin by entering the room where person dey learn humility, instead of flying go the other rooms. Because na that way person dey make progress, and if we get safe, level road wey we fit walk on, why we go want wings to fly? (I.II #10)

Saint Teresa dey use “humility” and “to know yourself” to mean the same thing. For her, both of dem na one and the same thing. Humility dey flow from knowing yourself. For this first dwelling place, humility dey begin grow when we deliberately seek to discover the truth about our own soul for the light of God’s greatness. To see wetin sin dey cause, especially mortal sin, suppose make us humble as we see say we no fit do anything without God’s grace and mercy. On top of that, e dey very important make we turn our eyes to God and seek God’s beauty wey no get end, the God wey dey inside us. The more clearly we see God through prayer and meditation, the more clearly we go understand how sinful we be and how we need God. Na this be the beginning of humility.

To use one comparison, something wey black dey look even blacker when dem put am for front of something wey white. Na so e be with our soul and how we know ourselves. The more clearly we see ourselves for the light of God beauty and greatness, the more clearly we go understand who we be. So, the best way to discover who you be, to see your sins and the beauty wey dey inside your very being, na to turn your eyes to God and keep your gaze on Am. Even though you must continue your journey towards the centre of the castle, Saint Teresa suggest say these dwelling places, the ones where you learn to know yourself, na places where you suppose spend extra time before you move on. The lessons wey you learn for these rooms go help you well-well for your journey.

Reflection: How well you know yourself? You know the sins wey you don commit? If so, you fit humbly confess those sins to God and accept responsibility for them? Sometimes we dey try justify our sins with the excuse say, na just who I be. We dey take our weaknesses and sins as who we be. But no be who we be be that. We be sons and daughters of the great King, and we must work to see ourselves that way. You dey do this?

Think too about how e often dey take plenty time to truly know yourself and, because of this, to get true humility. No rush to gain this knowledge. Take your time, and accept say plenty things still dey wey you need discover about yourself. Commit yourself to this slow, gentle and honest road of discovery, so that you go ready well to continue the journey.

My glorious King, help me see myself as You dey see me, and know myself as You know me. I pray make I always see with Your eyes, so I fit understand the true nature of my own soul. As I dey discover who I be, dear Lord, abeg help me no be only to see my sin, but also to see the dignity wey I get as Your child.

Most Holy Trinity wey dey dwell inside me, I love You, I trust You, I surrender my life to You.

Lesson Ten: Humility Wey No Be Real from Wrong Understanding of Yourself

As person dey seek the beautiful virtue of humility, e get traps wey person fit fall inside too. One kind of false humility dey wey we must avoid.

Oh, make God help my daughters! How many souls the devil must don ruin this way! Dem think say all these doubts and worries, and plenty more wey I fit describe, dey come from humility, when na because we no know ourselves well dem really dey come. We dey get wrong idea of our own nature, and if we no ever stop to dey think about ourselves, e no surprise me if we experience these fears and other ones wey worse pass them. Na because of this, my daughters, I dey talk say we must fix our eyes on Christ, our Good, na from Am we go learn true humility, and also on His saints (I.II #12).

Saint Teresa continue to stress how e important make we look at our miserable condition only for the light of God glory and beauty. She explain say if na only our miserable condition and sin we dey see, we fit fall into despair and confusion. The truth be say, to see our sin no dey do us any good unless we also see God mercy. If not, na only ourselves and our miserable condition we go dey look at.

The lesson wey we learn from this section be say some people dey spend plenty time dey think about themselves all day long. Sometimes dem dey think about how people don hurt them, dey dwell on anger and bitterness, dey think about their problems, and dey worry too much. All these na heavy loads wey sin cause. Other people, when dem dey seek to become more perfect, go accept one kind of false humility. This one dey show as dem dey look down on themselves, dey fix their minds on their weaknesses and sins without hope, dey fear say dem go fail for prayer, dey doubt whether dem fit become saints, dey worry about wetin other people think about them, and so on. These thoughts wey seem to “humble” person no be true humility, because dem no take God into account. True humility dey come only when we first look at God and see ourselves for the light of Who He be.

Reflection: You dey spend more time dey think about yourself or about God? If you want know yourself, you must stop to dey look at yourself. Instead, you must look at God. To see God beauty, strength, courage, goodness, mercy, patience and every other virtue go teach you more about yourself than to dey stare at your sin and miserable condition. How well you dey do this? Think about ways wey you fit turn your attention to God for the Person of our Lord, Jesus.

As you dey turn your attention to God, how you dey picture Am? You fit understand Who God be? Pray make God open your eyes so that you fit see Am as He be. To read the Gospels and meditate on Jesus words and actions go help. Come know Am well, so that wetin you know about Am go help you discover who you be. This knowledge of yourself dey produce true humility inside you. Pray for that gift of humility, then work to get am.

Look also at how the saint dem live their life. The saint dem dey show you clearly the kind person wey you must work to become. When you read about one saint wey inspire you for any way, no turn away from that inspiration too quick. Think about am again and again, and allow yourself discover who you be through the witness of these holy men and women.

My humble Lord, every virtue dey perfect for You. Your human nature unite perfectly with Your divine nature, and perfect beauty shine from You for everybody to see. But plenty people no see You as You really be. Abeg, open my eyes of faith so that I go begin understand You more clearly. Make I see Your virtue dem, Your Heart of mercy, Your strength, and Your pure goodness. As I dey see You, help me also discover who I be and the plenty ways wey I need to change, so that I go become the person wey You want make I be.

Most Holy Trinity wey dey dwell inside me, I love You, I trust You, I surrender my life to You.

Lesson Eleven: To Find Your Way through di First Places to Stay

Saint Teresa explain say for this first stage of the spiritual journey, plenty dwelling place dem dey wey person fit enter through. “Millions” of them dey. This one mean say plenty ways dey wey person fit begin the journey of faith. Everybody journey go different, and each person go begin live life of faith for their own special way.

About these first Mansion dem [Dwelling Place dem], I fit give some information wey go help well-well from wetin I don experience myself. For example, I must tell you make you think of them as place dem wey get no be just few rooms, but plenty rooms well-well. Plenty ways dey wey soul dem take enter them, always with good intention; but as devil intention dey always bad well-well, e get plenty legions of evil spirit dem for each room to stop soul dem from passing from one room to another. And as we, poor soul dem, no dey realise this thing, all kind deception dey trick us (I.II #13).

People dey come to faith for different ways. Some people grow up inside the faith, and the faith take root for their heart, so dem remain faithful all their life. Other people spend their early years dey find happiness, then dem receive the Word of God through holy preaching and begin respond. Some other people fit come to faith because of one tragedy for their life wey make dem turn to God. Still, other people discover the life of faith through countless other ways. Each of us get our own special path, and God go lead us for ways wey fit each one of us. You must open your heart to the special path wey God don give you, and no ever hesitate to begin the journey.

Reflection: How the seed of the Gospel take enter your heart? Wetin first lead you to turn to God more fully? This na important question to think deeply about. E fit show you the special way wey God go continue to lead you. If na through one particular prayer God first touch you, continue to dey pray that prayer. If na through the preaching of one particular person, continue to allow God speak to you through that person. Think deeply about the ways wey God don touch your own heart, and know say this na one dwelling place wey He want make you enter, wey be your own special path.

As you dey continue your journey, open your heart to new ways wey God go lead you. Try new things. Pray for different ways. Listen to different sermons. Learn about saint dem wey you never know before. Read more of the Scripture. When something new touch you deeply, stay with am for some time, allow am bear good fruit, and when the right time reach, move on to the next way wey God go take lead you closer to Him.

Lord of true wisdom, You don call me to follow You, and You don touch my soul for one personal and special way wey dey work for my life. I thank You for the divine way wey You don touch my heart. Abeg, help me to always turn to You through the ways wey You dey lead me, and speak to me so that I go know the path wey dey lead to the fullness of grace and mercy wey dey wait for me.

Most Holy Trinity wey dey dwell inside me, I love You, I trust You, I surrender my life to You.

Lesson Twelve: When di World Blind Your Eyes

For these first dwelling place dem, this first stage of spiritual growth, plenty demon dem dey try stop you from moving forward to the King.

E be like say person enter one place wey sunlight fill, but dust full e eyes so much that e almost no fit open them. The room itself get enough light, but e no fit enjoy the light because these wild beast and animal dem dey stop am. Dem dey force am to close e eyes to everything except themselves (I.II #15).

E dey important to understand how e easy reach to begin the journey towards God, then turn away and lose the small faith wey you don receive. Part of the reason na say plenty demon dem dey try deceive you for the beginning of your journey of faith. These demon dem wicked well-well, and the tricks wey dem dey use dey often work.

Saint Teresa explain say when you begin your journey of faith, many times, things of this world, pleasure of di flesh, honour and ambitions for this world still dey take all your attention. Di things wey your flesh dey crave, your feelings, emotions, thoughts and will still weak, dem dey confused, and e easy to deceive dem. Saint Teresa talk say di solution na to first work to repair your relationship with God, especially as you dey learn humility and admit your sin. Then, you must still beg di Blessed Mother and all di saints make dem pray for you.

Reflection: As you continue to enter di first places wey soul dey stay, wetin dey try stop you from staying there or even entering further inside? Which doubts, confusion or temptations dey come your way? Remind yourself say di devil and im army of demons hate you, and dem go fight with all their strength for your soul as you first begin turn to God. No give in. Work to renew your mind with di truth of di Gospels. Allow God to heal old wounds, emotions wey no dey in order, feelings of anger and bad habits. Ask our Blessed Mother make she pray for you. Consider to pray di rosary and other traditional devotions. Trust say di saints and angels fit fight for you for these first places wey soul dey stay, and allow dem help carry you through.

My dearest Mother Mary, I come to you with humility, and I ask you make you pray for me. I weak, and temptation to go back to my old life of sin dey come to me all di time. I still dey hold grudge and pain for my heart, I no dey clearly understand di ways of God, and memories of old sins still dey trouble me. Abeg, pray for me. I put myself under your motherly intercession and di intercession of all di angels and saints for Heaven. Through their prayers, dear Lord, keep me safe as I dey journey come closer to You.

Most Holy Trinity wey dey dwell inside me, I love You, I trust You, I surrender my life to You.

Lesson Thirteen: File Wey No Dey Make Noise

One final lesson wey Saint Teresa teach about di first places wey soul dey stay na say another way dey wey di devil take dey tempt people wey don begin their journey of faith, and this way even harder to notice.

As I tell you before, e dey work like file wey no dey make noise, and we must dey watch out for am from di beginning. To explain this one better, I wan give you some examples… (I.II #15).

Wetin be “file wey no dey make noise?” Ordinary file na steel tool wey dem dey use rub or scrape hard surface commot small-small. So, spiritual file dey work quietly, without anybody noticing, as e dey wear your soul down small-small. Saint Teresa explain say when person truly turn to God, di person often dey get new zeal for spiritual things. Di problem be say this new zeal fit often follow wrong direction. When this one happen, di person no dey realise say na di evil one dey mislead am. Di demons dey tempt di soul as “angels of light,” dey deceive am with false reasoning and lead am to believe say bad action na good one.

Di first example wey Saint Teresa give na of one nun wey want do severe penance so she go grow for holiness, but her superior forbid her to do am. Because her zeal don follow wrong direction, she still do am, dey secretly think say this one go help her grow for holiness. But her disobedience block all di grace wey she dey hope for, because di devil trick her and make her think say her disobedience na virtuous action.

Di second example na another sister wey deeply desire to reach perfection. Because of this desire, she come dey worry too much about even di smallest faults of her fellow sisters, and she dey pay more attention to those faults than to di love wey she herself no dey show. In di same way, dem deceive her to think say her efforts to identify di sins of her fellow sisters na act of love and her duty.

These temptations wey hard to notice dey make our love for other people grow cold. We must seek to love God with all our heart, but we must also love our neighbour as we love ourselves. If di devil see say we don dedicate ourselves to love God, e go try trick us make we no show love to other people—all under di cover of religion wey make us feel say na we righteous pass.

Reflection: You get zeal for God? You get strong desire to grow for di faith and spread di Good News to other people? If na so, know say your zeal fit follow wrong direction. Wetin you dey think about other people? You dey focus too much on their sins? You dey always find fault and judge dem?

Also, you dey humble and willing to yield when you dey deal with other people? Even if you never take vow of obedience to any superior, you owe other people, especially your family members, some willingness to yield to dem. This one no mean say make you give in to temptations. But you must avoid to dey argue, and even look for chances, sometimes, to leave wetin you yourself want and choose wetin dem want, because of love.

If you want love God with all your heart, remind yourself say you must also love other people with humility and sincerity. Think about the people wey dey your life, and understand say your love for God no fit strong pass your love for everybody else. Anywhere wey you see say love dey lack, or you dey judge others, dey stubborn, or dey harsh in any way, work to correct those things so that dem no go block your journey towards holiness.

My Lord wey dey full of zeal, You want make my soul dey purified from all pride, selfishness, judging others, stubbornness, and treating people like enemies. Help me see which relationships need Your grace and mercy, and help me open my heart to the truths wey I need to hear. Make I love all Your children with Your Heart, so that love for You and for other people go grow plenty and draw me closer to You.

Most Holy Trinity wey dey live inside me, I love You, na You I trust, I hand over my life to You.

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