When one soul don fully embrace the virtue of humility, and after that, embrace life of surrendering everything to God with trust, the gates wey dey hold back the flood of mercy go open.ย This chapter go reflect on this experience of mercy from four different angles.ย First, God mercy wey dey flow like flood into this humble soul wey trust Am dey come to free the soul from sin.ย Second, once the soul don free from sin, e go experience deep inside am the grace of freedom and new life for God, wey get even greater glory.ย Third, because mercy no get end, this person heart no fit contain am, so mercy go begin overflow from this person enter other people life through acts of forgiveness and reconciliation.ย Fourth, once this humble soul wey trust God and dey show mercy forgive another person, and that person accept the forgiveness, one spiritual bond of true friendship for Christ go form.ย Love wey dey make sacrifice go then give life to that bond, and e go bear good fruit wey nobody fit measure.
We suppose receive mercy from God and give am to others without limit.ย Our relationship with God and how we receive His mercy must become di foundation of our lives.ย As we dey grow for love of God, di holiness wey we dey experience go become wetin dey guide how we relate with one another.ย Every person wey God bring enter our lives go experience God’s mercy through us for di way wey God choose.ย As we continue to open our hearts to Him, E go use us form holy bonds of love with everybody wey dey willing to receive dat love.
Mercy for Sin โ Forgiveness or Condemnation
E easy to think say mercy and justice dey against each other.ย But no be so.ย Justice na wetin dey come from one of two forms of mercy: either di mercy of forgiveness or di mercy of condemnation.ย Di mercy wey sinner go receive depend completely on how dat sinner’s heart dey.ย God dey offer forgiveness to people wey truly dey sorry and dey turn from sin come meet Him.ย People wey remain stubborn and refuse to acknowledge their sin dey receive condemnation.ย Both forgiveness and condemnation na acts of mercy from God.ย Condemnation dey fulfil God’s justice by allowing di effects of sin to come upon di sinner so e go turn from sin come meet God.ย Forgiveness dey fulfil God’s justice by accepting di sinner’s sincere sorrow for sin and removing di sin.ย Condemnation dey leave person bound under di heavy load of sin.ย Forgiveness dey free person from those chains.
Di best way to understand these two forms of mercy na to look at God and His love for us as Scripture reveal am.ย Here na two Scripture passages wey good make we take time reflect on so we go understand God’s mercy as e dey come as forgiveness condemnation
Forgiveness for di Woman Wey Commit Adultery:ย
Then di scribes and di Pharisees bring one woman wey dem catch for adultery, and dem make am stand for middle. Dem tell am, โTeacher, dem catch dis woman as e dey commit adultery. Now, for di law, Moses command us to stone women like dis to death.ย So wetin you talk?โย Dem talk dis to test am, so dem go get something to use accuse am. Jesus bend down and begin use im finger write for ground. But as dem continue to ask am, e stand straight and tell dem, โMake di person among una wey no get sin be di first to throw stone at am.โ Again, e bend down and write for ground.ย As dem hear dis, dem begin comot one by one, starting with di elders. So na only am remain with di woman wey stand before am.ย Then Jesus stand straight and tell am, โWoman, where dem dey? Nobody condemn you?โย E answer, โNobody, sir.โ Then Jesus talk, โMe too no condemn you. Go, [and] from now on, no sin again.โย John 8:3-11
Di woman for dis story need forgiveness.ย Dem catch am as e dey commit adultery, and e guilty of serious sin.ย Di punishment wey di law set for im sin na death.ย But instead of condemning am, Jesus choose to forgive am.ย And through dat act of forgiveness, E fulfil justice perfectly through dis form of mercy.
For dis story, Jesus no make excuse for dis woman’s sin or treat im adultery as โsomething wey no serious.โย Instead, as E tell am, โMe too no condemn youโ and โGo, and from now on, no sin again,โ Jesus dey acknowledge im sin and di right wey E get to condemn am.ย So, true mercy require say person must honestly acknowledge im sins and clearly see di consequences of those sins.
One part of this story wey dem no talk plainly na say Jesus know wetin dey this woman heart.ย E know say she know her sin, and E know say she dey sorry for am.ย Wetin happen don humble her, and she accept this humility.ย Na because she humble herself, recognize her sin and admit am, Jesus fit offer her forgiveness instead of condemnation.ย She accept that mercy with trust.ย If she bin dey see herself as righteous and refuse to admit her guilt, Jesus mercy for take the form of condemnation.ย
Condemnation of the Scribes and Pharisees:
Anybody wey lift imself up, dem go humble am; but anybody wey humble imself, dem go lift am up.
โWahala dey for una, scribes and Pharisees, una wey dey pretend say una righteous. Una dey lock the kingdom of heaven against people. Una no dey enter, and una no dey allow the people wey dey try to enter make dem enter.
โWahala dey for una, scribes and Pharisees, una wey dey pretend say una righteous. Una dey travel across sea and land to make one person join una religion, and when e don join, una go make am pikin of Gehenna wey bad reach two times as una.
โWahala dey for una, blind guides, wey dey talk say, โIf person swear with the temple, e no mean anything, but if person swear with the gold for the temple, e must keep the oath.โย Una blind fools, which one greater: the gold, or the temple wey make the gold holy?ย And una dey talk say, โIf person swear with the altar, e no mean anything, but if person swear with the gift wey dey on top the altar, e must keep the oath.โย Una blind people, which one greater: the gift, or the altar wey dey make the gift holy?ย Person wey swear with the altar swear with am and everything wey dey on top am;ย person wey swear with the temple swear with am and with the One wey dey live inside am;ย person wey swear with heaven swear with God throne and with the One wey sit on top am.
โWahala dey for una, scribes and Pharisees, una wey dey pretend say una righteous. Una dey pay tithe from mint, dill and cummin, but una don neglect the things for the law wey matter pass: to judge with justice, to show mercy and to dey faithful. [But] na these things una suppose do, without neglecting the other ones.ย Una blind guides, wey dey filter out small fly but swallow camel!
โWahala dey for una, scribes and Pharisees, una wey dey pretend say una righteous. Una dey wash the outside of cup and plate, but inside dem full with things wey una loot and the way una dey satisfy una own desires without control.ย Blind Pharisee, first clean the inside of the cup, so that the outside too fit clean.
โWahala dey for una, scribes and Pharisees, una wey dey pretend say una righteous. Una be like tombs wey dem paint white, wey fine for outside, but inside dem full with bones of dead people and every kind of dirty thing.ย Na so una too dey appear righteous for outside, but inside una full with pretence and evil deeds.
โWahala dey for una, scribes and Pharisees, una wey dey pretend say una righteous. Una dey build tombs for the prophets and decorate the memorials of righteous people, and una dey talk say, โIf we bin live for the time of our ancestors, we for no join dem shed the prophets blood.โย So una dey testify against unaselves say una be children of the people wey murder the prophets; now make una fill up the measure wey una ancestors start!ย Una snakes, una children of vipers, how una fit escape the judgment of Gehenna?ย So, make una see, I dey send prophets, wise men and scribes come meet una; una go kill and crucify some of dem, una go flog some for una synagogues and pursue dem from town to town, so that una go answer for all the blood of righteous people wey dem shed for earth, from the blood of righteous Abel to the blood of Zechariah, son of Barachiah, wey una murder between the sanctuary and the altar.ย Amen, I dey tell una, all these things go come upon this generation.โย Matthew 23:12-36
Dem quote this long series of condemnations in full to show the clear, powerful condemnation wey Jesus speak against the scribes and Pharisees, wey dey pierce reach person heart.ย Jesus talk say, โWahala dey for unaโฆโ seven times one after another, to show say His rebuke na complete condemnation.ย The question now na this: This one mean say Jesus no show mercy, as E choose justice instead of mercy?ย
As we don explain above, justice and mercy no dey against each other.ย Both justice and mercy dey work hand in hand.ย How person go receive mercy and how justice go take happen depend on the heart of the person wey dey receive am.ย For this passage, Jesus fulfil justice through ikpe wey condemn dem wey zuru complete.ย The way Jesus talk with finality and firmness show say the scribes and Pharisees don completely harden their heart.ย Dem no get humility, and because of this, dem no fit turn to Jesus with trust.ย Dem no even open their heart small to see their sins and repent from dem.ย So, na act of great mercy Jesus do as E pronounce this strong judgment wey condemn dem.ย Na mercy because the aim of the seven judgments wey E pronounce against dem na to turn their heart back to God by showing dem their sins.ย Wetin Jesus for hope na say, as dem hear this judgment, dem go listen, humble themselves, repent and seek forgiveness.ย We fit dey sure say if any one of dem repent after this rebuke, e for receive forgiveness.ย But if dem still harden their heart and remain for their sins, then God justice for happen through the judgment wey dem receive from this condemnation wey zuru complete.
Of course, this book take am say you don already dey try to get humility and trust for God, and because of this, you no need this kind judgment wey our Lord use condemn person.ย Still, e good to remind you of this kind mercy wey God dey show people wey dey proud and wey don harden their heart, so that you go remember say you need to continue to seek humility and trust every day.ย Even faithful Christian fit fall into sin.ย When you sin, you ready to repent and humble yourself before God?ย If you no ready, you go experience the same judgment wey Jesus pronounce against the scribes and Pharisees.ย The effect of this judgment na deep suffering inside their heart, as dem become slave to sin and the things wey sin dey cause.ย And na heavy load to carry.ย Still, this judgment na act of mercy wey aim to turn the sinner back to God.
Mercy Wey Pass Forgiveness โ Freedom and New Life for Christ
Even though the first purpose of mercy na forgiveness of sins, e no stop there.ย Once God offer you forgiveness and you receive am for your heart, God dey invite you to share for the freedom and glory of His life wey dey overflow.ย We dey see this second level of mercy for the story of the Prodigal Son.
The Prodigal Son:
When e come back to im senses, e think say, โSee how many workers wey my papa hire get food wey pass wetin dem fit chop, but see me here, hunger dey kill me. I go get up go meet my papa, and I go tell am say, โPapa, I don sin against heaven and against you.ย I no deserve again make dem call me your son; treat me like one of the workers wey you hire.โโย So e get up go back to im papa. As e still dey far away, im papa see am, and compassion fill im heart. E run go meet im son, embrace am and kiss am.ย Im son tell am say, โPapa, I don sin against heaven and against you; I no deserve again make dem call me your son.โย But im papa order im servants say, โQuick, bring the finest robe make una wear am for am; put ring for im finger and sandals for im feet.ย Carry the calf wey dem don fatten and slaughter am. Then make we celebrate with feast, because this my son don die, and e don come back to life; e don lost, and we don find am.โย Then the celebration start.ย Luke 15:18-24
This passage show how the son come back to im senses after e experience the effects of im wayward life, and how e knowingly choose to beg im papa for forgiveness.ย Part of wetin move am na the terrible condition of im life and the fact say e no get food.ย Another thing wey move am na as e realise say e don sin and say im papa get mercy.
Even though im sorrow and contrition for sin fit no dey perfect, dem dey enough for am to receive the gift of forgiveness from im papa straightaway.ย But this passage show plenty more than just one act of forgiveness.ย The papa no only forgive am; e also invite im son to share for im joy wey dey overflow.ย E do this as e wear the finest robe for am, put ring for im finger, kill the calf wey dem don fatten and celebrate with big feast.ย The son come meet im papa with hope say e go only get forgiveness and the basic things wey e need to live.ย But the papa no fit hold im joy as im son return, and e pour im mercy on am without holding anything back.
Na so e still be for us as we dey experience God mercy. When we repent, even if our sorrow for sin no perfect, God dey forgive us. E dey quick to forgive us without measure, no matter di sin wey we commit. For our own side, e fit hard us to understand how e dey easy for God to forgive. Many times, we no dey expect much forgiveness from Am, and we no dey realise say E want forgive us far more than we want make E forgive us. Because of this, e fit still hard us to understand say God want give us much more than forgiveness. E still want invite us to celebrate His glorious feast. Na feast wey through am we dey receive gifts wey no get limit: freedom, joy, peace, patience, strength and other gifts like dem. God want give us every good gift, and E want give us plenty of dem. For our own side, na only to dey ready and willing to accept everything wey E freely choose to give us.
One of di first things wey we go experience once God don forgive our sin na freedom (liberty). All of us get free will, even if we still remain inside our sin. But โfreedomโ (liberty) mean much more than that. Freedom na di experience inside us when dem don cut di attachment wey we get to sin, so that our hearts fit then hold on to God and His holy will. This experience be like when dem lift spiritual heavy load comot from our souls.
To use one example, imagine say somebody dey prison. One day, one judge show am mercy and grant am full pardon. Joy dey when person receive pardon, but the joy of freedom from prison pass that one. Now, imagine say as this same prisoner gain freedom, dem give am plenty wealth and restore the life wey e get before to am ten times over. The new life wey this former prisoner dey experience pass the pardon; before long, e begin discover and use im freedom as e begin live the new life wey dem don give am.
So, the โfeast of mercyโ first involve complete freedom from sin, from guilt, from shame and from all the chains of sin. But from there, the plenty joy wey dey wait for us pass wetin we fit ever understand. Too many times, temptation dey come make we hold on to our past sins, even when God don forgive us. Freedom mean say we come understand and experience the truth say our past mistakes no be everything wey define who we be. We get future. And that future na to share gloriously for the new life wey God don plan for us. God don free us from the chains of sin, and E dey invite us to live new and glorious life in Christ.
As we dey experience new life, we go begin experience the Fruits of the Spirit. As we talk for the chapter before this one, these Fruits of the Spirit dey help us discern God will. But dem no be only signs wey dey show us wetin we suppose do. Dem be much more than that. The Fruits of the Spirit no get limit, and dem dey continue to increase for our lives as we dey enter deeper into God mercy. Dem become the way we dey experience our new life in Christ as human beings. According to Church tradition, we dey talk of twelve Fruits of the Holy Spirit. Na these fruits be:
Love: The ability to show care and devotion for our thoughts and actions, with the same love wey God dey show everybody
One spiritual experience wey dey lift our spirit, give us strength and make us glad
Peace: Deep calm wey dey with us for good times and for hard times
Patience: The ability to endure anything wey fit come, with peace and strength, without anger or frustration
Kindness: The quality of using words and doing things wey show care and bring joy
Goodness: To dey genuine for virtue and character
Long Patience: Strength when the crosses of life heavy and last long
Gentleness: To get steady temper, calm mind and balanced spirit, without pretence
Faithfulness: To hold firmly to God and His Kingdom without shaking
Modesty: The quality of seeing yourself with honesty and purity, and treating your own body with respect and reverence
Self-Control: Strength to overcome your strong feelings and desires, and to resist temptations
Chastity: Deep respect for your own sexuality and the sexuality of other people
Take time to pray and reflect on these blessings from God. To understand dem na one way to understand the experience of new life in Christ. Each of these fruits dey show one particular way wey this new life dey appear. God want give all of dem to those wey dey humble, wey trust Am, and wey don receive complete forgiveness of their sins. As you reflect on these fruits for the last chapter as signs to help you discern God will, now reflect on dem as blessings wey God don give you, so that you fit enter fully into the life wey God mercy dey give in abundance wey pass measure.
Mercy Wey Plenty Pass Measure โ Mercy Wey Dey Overflow Reach the Sins of Other People
Mercy must full your life, overflow enter other people life.ย God mercy go flow from your life enter other people life the same way wey you receive mercy.ย First, God dey call you to show mercy for the sin wey other people commit.ย Make we start again by reflecting on one passage for Scripture, so that we go understand the matter well.
Parable of the Servant Wey No Gree Forgive
Then Peter come near am, ask am, โLord, if my brother sin against me, how many times I must forgive am? Na up to seven times?โย Jesus answer, โI dey tell you, no be seven times, but seventy-seven times.ย Na why we fit compare the kingdom of heaven to one king wey decide to settle account with im servants.ย When e begin check the accounts, dem bring one person come meet am wey owe am very big debt.ย As the servant no get any way to pay am back, im master order make dem sell am, together with im wife, im children and all im property, to pay the debt.ย Then the servant fall down before am, bow to honour am, and talk say, โAbeg, get patience with me, and I go pay you everything back.โย Pity touch the servant master for heart, so e let am go and cancel the debt.ย When that servant comot, e meet one of im fellow servants wey owe am much smaller money.ย E grab am and begin press im throat, dey demand say, โPay wetin you owe me.โย Im fellow servant kneel down, beg am say, โAbeg, get patience with me, and I go pay you back.โย But e no gree. Instead, e make dem put am for prison until e pay the debt back.ย When im fellow servants see wetin happen, the matter trouble dem well-well, and dem go tell their master everything wey happen.ย Im master call am come, tell am say, โYou wicked servant! I cancel all your debt because you beg me.ย You no suppose pity your fellow servant, just as I pity you?โย Then im master vex, hand am over to the people wey go torture am until e pay all the debt back.ย Na so my Father for heaven go do to una, unless each of una forgive im brother from im heart.โย Matthew 18:21-35
This parable dey help us understand plenty things well.ย E no only show say God ready and willing to forgive โvery plentyโ sin for your life; e still show say after that, you must forgive other people to that same extent.ย And if you no do so, you go lose the forgiveness wey you don receive.
The very nature of mercy be say, when you receive am from God, you must show am to other people to the same extent.ย E important to understand say this one na essential part of the very nature of mercy.ย E be like say you must see yourself as funnel wey mercy dey pass through.ย God no go pour am into your life unless you dey willing to open your heart make e flow go meet others.ย Any attempt to keep mercy for only yourself, without giving am to others, go immediately stop this gift from God wey no get limit.
Also, e important to understand say the more you open your heart to pour mercy on other people, the more God go pour mercy into your life.ย The two dey directly connected.ย To understand this truth suppose fill you with zeal to show mercy as much as you fit.
The first step to show mercy concern the sin wey another person commit.ย For one sense, you dey for blessed position when somebody sin against you.ย No be say their sin na blessing in any way.ย Rather, you dey blessed because the sin wey another person commit against you dey invite you to forgive.ย This one dey show God power, because God fit turn the sin wey another person commit against you into opportunity for you to grow in holiness and for that person to turn to God.ย You dey become holy as you follow God example and share for the forgiveness wey E dey show you.ย Remember the Beatitude, โBlessed na the people wey dey show mercy, because dem go receive mercyโ (Matthew 5: 7).
Remember too, from the beginning of this chapter, say na only when you dey sorry for your sins you fit receive God forgiveness.ย When you stubbornly continue for your sins, God dey pronounce His condemnation to satisfy His justice and turn your heart back to Am.ย This same principle concern how you dey show mercy to other people.ย Even though you must always forgive, sometimes you go meet people wey stubbornly continue for the sin wey dem dey commit against you.ย When this happen, the forgiveness wey you dey offer dem must also take the form of holy correction wey come from love.ย Your correction no fit be judgment of their hearts, because na only God know the heart.ย But e must condemn the actions wey truly be sin.
Di greatest correction wey you fit give another person out of love na to forgive am. When you forgive, you dey actually point to di sinful action. You no dey excuse am; you dey forgive am. When you talk say you forgive one particular action, you dey acknowledge say di action wrong in itself. Some people go welcome this forgiveness, and true reconciliation go happen. Others no go admit di wrong wey dem do, and because of that, your act of forgiveness go become something wey God go use condemn dem. But na mercy this be! E no be judgment of person heart; instead, na judgment of di person action. In fact, without this kind judgment, person no fit offer forgiveness.
As e suppose be, when person sin against you, e go ask for forgiveness.ย For that kind case, e much easier to forgive and fully reconcile.ย But when another person no ask for your forgiveness, and e stubbornly continue to do wetin wrong, you must โcondemnโ am through your act of forgiveness.ย From there, God go take over and accomplish wetin E want accomplish.
mercy wey dey condemn wey God dey call you to show other people go take different forms.ย For example, if you be parent, many times God go call you to correct your children out of love.ย You must judge wetin dem do and stand firm with dem when wetin dem do dey against God law.ย You must also correct your husband or wife, your brothers and sisters, your friends and other people for di right way and at di right time.ย But correction must always begin with you forgiving di person inside your heart, and e must address only wetin di person actually do.
What if person stubbornly continue to sin against you?ย How you go respond?ย These Scripture passages na good guides:
โIf your brother sin [against you], go tell am wetin e do wrong when na only you and am dey there. If e listen to you, you don win your brother back.ย If e no listen, take one or two other people follow body, so that โdem fit establish every fact through di testimony of
two or three witnesses.โย If e refuse to listen to dem, tell di Church.ย If e refuse to listen even to di Church, then treat am as you go treat Gentile or tax collector.โ Matthew ย 18:15-17
โAnybody wey no go receive you or listen to your wordsโcomot from that house or town and shake di dust from your feet.โย Matthew 10:14
When you go meet somebody to tell am about im sin, you must take care to understand Jesus words correctly. Di duty to โcorrect one another as brothers and sistersโ no give you free hand to judge another person heart. Instead, e dey very important make you look only at di actions themselves of di people wey you get duty to correct, and no assume say you know their intentions. Big difference dey between these two ways.
To judge wetin person do simply mean say you consider wetin you see for outside, and address am with love when di thing appear to dey against God law and e dey cause some kind disagreement.ย For example, if person use dirty words take talk about another person and dey find fault with am, you no need to know wetin dey im heart before you know say those words no proper.ย So, when you correct your brother or sister, you no dey judge say this person na sinner; instead, you dey judge say di words wey e talk no agree with God law.ย Even though this difference fit no easy to notice, e important well-well if you want correct another person with honesty.
To make am more specific, make we say one friend talk plenty harsh words wey no proper about person wey e dey work with.ย How you suppose respond?ย You suppose take note of these harsh words and talk about dem with your friend.ย You fit ask am more about wetin dey frustrate am and try to understand am more clearly.ย As you dey do this, if your friend show more clearly say anger don fill im heart and e no fit forgive, then you get chance to talk gently about why e need to forgive.ย For this case, your friend don show you wetin dey im conscience in a way wey allow you address wetin e talk.
Or, make we say husband or wife talk one word to find fault with di other person when anger carry am.ย Once di strong feelings don calm down, e important well-well to draw im attention to di way e burst out in anger.ย Di best thing to do, and di one wey show mercy pass, na to tell your husband or wife say di words wey e talk cause pain.ย To do so no be to judge im heart; na to judge wetin e do for outside.ย Also, unless una address these actions directly and heal di wounds wey dem cause, e go hard to reconcile and enter deeper into relationship of love as di years dey pass.
Another important thing to consider when you dey decide whether to correct somebody na whether di person dey willing to accept di correction or not. For example, if emotions still dey high and e clear say frustration dey, e show more mercy to wait and talk about these actions later. Sadly, for some relationships, hostility no dey ever stop, and because of that, e dey very hard to seek reconciliation through correction. Even so, hope must always dey say reconciliation go finally happen.
If you judge say di time no right to bring up di action wey cause hurt or wey no proper, e still dey very important make you offer di mercy of forgiveness inside your heart. And when di hurt serious, di forgiveness must even greater, even if reconciliation no possible. Note say โforgivenessโ simply mean say you do an act of mercy inside you, as you forgive dem for your heart. โReconciliationโ mean say di person wey sin dey sorry, e ask for your forgiveness, e receive am from you, and because of that, una relationship come back well and become stronger.
To Pray for the Mercy to Forgive
One way wey fit help you forgive person for your heart, even when the person still dey stubborn, na to pray for that person.ย But to forgive person wey wound you fit hard well-well.ย No be something wey you fit just do overnight.ย E need plenty grace and for you to surrender yourself to God.ย And e need plenty prayer.
Jesus no dey ever ask us to do anything wey He no dey willing to do.ย From the Cross, He forgive the people wey just treat Am with that kind wickedness.ย This chaplet wey dey below dey meant to help people wey dey struggle to forgive another person.ย If na so e be for you, pray am every day, so that God fit free you from this load.
The Chaplet for the Mercy to Forgive Another Person
This chaplet wey follow (wey different from the Chaplet of Divine Mercy) na prayer wey dem also dey use rosary pray.ย The prayers come from Scripture. ย The first prayer come from St. Stephen, the first Christian martyr.ย He talk am just before he die as dem dey stone am:
โLord, no hold this sin against dem.โย Acts 7:60
Di second prayer come from di very words wey Jesus talk as E hang for di Cross dey die:
โFather, forgive dem, because dem no know wetin dem dey doย Luke 23:34
Start with one Our Father, one Hail Mary and di Apostles’ Creed.
Then, for the big bead of each decade of the rosary, pray:
Lord, no hold this sin against dem, because You full of mercy and compassion for everybody.ย Abeg, give me the grace to forgive so that I go fit follow the example of Your perfect love.
Then, for di ten small beads for each group of ten beads for di Rosary, pray:
Father, forgive dem, because dem no know wetin dem dey do.
End all di five groups of ten beads by saying dis three times:
Lord Jesus, Son of the Living God, have mercy on me wey be sinner.
Amen.
This na powerful prayer wey get im foundation for Holy Scripture.ย If e dey hard you to forgive person wey wound you and wey refuse to settle with you, then begin pray this chaplet for that person every day.ย You go wonder how much e go help.
As e suppose be, when you forgive person, the person wey sin against you go humbly accept your forgiveness, and una go settle with each other.ย But many times, the person wey you don forgive no go agree say e do wrong, and because of this, e no dey ready to accept your forgiveness.ย So una no go fit settle with each other.ย Maybe you don pray for person (like your husband or wife, or your pikin), and you don forgive am again and again for your heart, but e no accept your forgiveness. Instead, e hold on to im sin and still dey see imself as righteous.ย Sadly, when this kind thing happen, all wey you fit do na to continue to forgive.ย If na so e be for you, no let your spirit fall.ย To lose courage na direct attack on hope, and once hope don lost, heart wey dey forgive go grow cold and full of anger.ย No let that one happen to you.
When somebody for your life stubbornly continue to do things wey dey hurt you, all you fit do na to pray and wait for di time when di person go ready for reconciliation. Remember di passage about di Prodigal Son wey we read earlier. For that story, di father dey wait and continually dey look out for im son to return. E see im son from far and run go meet am. Na so e must be with you too. You must continually look into di โdistance,โ dey search for any sign say di person wey you need to reconcile with don ready. If you notice any willingness, pay attention to am and dey ready to show mercy and forgiveness.
But for some cases, time fit reach to โshake di dust comot from your feet,โ as di Scripture passage wey we quote earlier show. Wetin this one mean? Na holy way to share in di mercy of condemnation. When stubbornness don deep, and you don try every way to reconcile, time fit reach when di thing wey show mercy pass wey you fit do for another person na to โwipe di dust comot from your feet.โ This one no mean say you go treat dem in rude, fault-finding and sinful way. Instead, e mean say you let dem see how their actions dey affect una relationship. You allow di stubbornness wey dem dey show to become more visible. But na mercy this be.
This act of โshaking dust comot for your feetโ fit happen for different ways.ย For example, e fit be say the only proper response wey you fit give somebody na to show your sorrow.ย No be to use quiet way show anger or hurt the person, but na with mercy and sorrow (โBlessed na those wey dey mournโฆโ Matthew 5:4).ย When person stubborn well-well, to keep quiet with sorrow fit really show love.ย This na one way to show the effect of the other person actions wey no dey right.ย To keep quiet with sorrow go become like โloudโ voice wey dey show the effect of another person refusal to settle.
But make you dey careful, pray, forgive for your heart and allow God to guide you.ย Again, person fit easily use this kind mercy cover the anger wey e dey show for quiet way.ย But to use quiet way show anger or hurt person still na attack.ย And attack no be mercy.ย When God call you to keep quiet with sorrow towards another person, you must always hold strong hope say una go settle.ย And just as the father for the story of the Prodigal Son stand dey wait and dey look far away so that e go settle with im son, na so you too must always dey ready and willing to settle as soon as even the smallest chance show.
We hope say wetin we describe above no go need to happen for the relationships wey close to you pass.ย We hope say people hearts go always dey open to settle with each other.ย When their hearts dey open like this, the Feast of Mercy wey full with plenty blessings dey wait for them to experience am for every relationship.ย And this Feast of Mercy dey show through the gift of love wey dey make sacrifice.ย
The Joy of Spiritual Friendship and Giving Yourself with Sacrifice
As St. Thomas Aquinas talk, โNothing dey for this earth wey deserve make we value am pass true friendshipโ (About Kingship, To the King of Cyprus, book 1, chapter 11, paragraph 77).ย The bond of true friendship dey form when people give and receive God mercy for way wey pass only forgiveness of sins.ย True friendship na the result when two people each unite with Christ and, because of this, each one dey show Christ love to the other.ย This kind โfriendship in Christโ concern every relationship of love wey you get.ย True-true, you no fit be โbestโ friends with everybody wey you meet, and you no fit be friends with everybody for the normal way wey people understand friendship.ย Time and strength dey limit how many people we fit get close relationship with.ย But you fit form โtrue bond of friendshipโ with everybody wey dey live their life in Christ, even if na only short talk from time to time the friendship involve.ย Even for that kind case, e fit still bring plenty joy because e go share for God mercy wey dey pour out.ย โTrue bond of friendshipโ fit also form among people wey know each other more deeply.ย Husband and wife, neighbours, โbestโ friends, brothers and sisters, and others na relationships wey suppose also share for the holy bond of friendship in Christ.
How person dey experience true friendship in Christ?ย How person dey live am?ย First, remember John Gospel: โNobody get love wey pass this one, to lay down im life for im friendsโ (John 15:13).ย ย ย E important to note say Jesus call us to lay down our lives for our โfriends.โย This mean say na only those wey we don settle with and wey share one bond with us in Christ we fit offer mercy wey reach the highest level.ย As we don talk before, when somebody still dey stubborn for the sin wey e dey commit against us, we no fit offer mercy for this next level.ย Their stubbornness dey keep us for the level of forgiveness, and dem go continue to experience the โcondemnationโ wey our forgiveness dey bring until dem repent and accept our forgiveness inside their hearts.
Once you don truly settle with another person and una don become friends in Christ, God dey call you to pour Im mercy on the person without holding back.ย The fullest way to do this na through love wey dey make sacrifice, wey go make you put the other person first and love am with your whole being.ย Na to give your very self.ย Different people go experience this deep love wey dey make sacrifice for different ways, but e go always be to share for Christ perfect love of sacrifice, as E show am perfectly for the Cross.ย To talk am clearly, e go always be the gift of your whole self wey you freely give for the sake of the other person.
The first thing wey we suppose note about love wey involve sacrifice na say e dey โinvolve sacrifice.โย Wey involve sacrifice fit easily make person think say na something bad wey person no go want.ย Na because, when we look am with selfish mind, e no be wetin we go want.ย Because of our selfishness, we dey prefer to take instead of to give.ย But mercy dey free us from this kind selfishness and help us discover way to live wey get far greater glory.ย Remember wetin Scripture talk: โAnybody wey want save im life go lose am, but anybody wey lose im life because of Me go find amโ (Matthew 16:25).ย To lose your life because of Christ and, through that one, become instrument of His mercy na wetin God create you for.ย So, as you dey give yourself to others, you dey discover who you be and become fully human for state of grace wey don reach perfection.ย Na through this way you go become the person wey God create you to be.ย You go become more fully human as you dey live the way wey God intend for you to live, and become more fully the person wey God create you to be.
This deep love wey husband and wife share go show as support wey dem dey give each other, when each one dey seek wetin good for the other.ย Children go always get care, and dem go meet some of their needs, when parents give dem this kind deep love wey no get condition.ย Inside family, you get special duty to give yourself completely.ย
But mercy no get limit inside the heart of Christ.ย So, every day, God go inspire you to give your heart to others in different ways.ย Even though this one no give another person right to demand from you more than wetin God dey call you to give, you go still show mercy to every person completely and without condition.ย Many times, God go also bless you with some people wey you go share plenty of wetin dey your heart and your life with.ย When people for these friendships share for the mercy of God with each other, the fruit wey their close relationship dey bear dey sustain dem, change dem, lift their spirit and make dem holy.ย Even Jesus get people for His life wey He share special close friendship with, and He spend extra time and strength with dem.ย Think about the Apostles, Mary, Martha and Lazarus.ย But Jesus still extend His friendship to everybody, even people wey He only spend short time with.ย He continue to give from His heart, with sacrifice, to people wey open their heart to receive His love.
The main thing about love wey involve sacrifice no be mainly the amount of time and strength wey you give another person; instead, na the quality of the love wey you show.ย The quality of love wey you give a โfriendโ for Christ must always reach the highest level wey e fit reach.ย Even if na only for one short moment.
Love wey involve sacrifice go also โpainโ for one kind way.ย E dey pain because this level of love need make you continue to choose, with humble heart, to put the other person first.ย E need make you continue to die to yourself, so you go always be instrument of the mercy of God, as e show from the Cross.ย Love dey pain.ย But na pain wey still sweet.ย The sweetness dey inside the good fruit wey dey come when you give your heart as completely as you fit.ย And when person experience this โsweetness,โ the sacrifice wey love involve no go be burden at all.
Another experience wey we fit get wey dey โpainโ na spiritual dryness.ย Deep inside their heart, many saints don experience one kind inner dryness for their relationship with God.ย E dey feel to dem like say God no dey, even though He dey very close to dem.ย But this experience of dryness na so that the saint go begin love God for level wey deep pass before: love wey come from the will.ย Dem no dey see God clearly again, dem no dey sense His presence, but dem still choose to love Him and choose to do His will because of love, no be because of wetin dem dey feel.
Sometimes, we fit also experience this dryness for the love wey we get for others.ย For example, parents fit no always feel joy inside their heart for everything wey dem dey do to love and care for their children.ย Their love wey involve sacrifice go always give dem sense of fulfilment, but no be good feeling go always move dem to show this love.ย In fact, when that good feeling no dey again, their love fit become more holy and bring more good to their children.ย Na because this kind love involve more sacrifice, and dem dey show am only out of mercy, as dem dey imitate the Cross of Christ.ย E go become love wey no dey seek anything for itself, and wey dey focus more on wetin good for the other person.ย To give yourself out of love fit often make you feel good, but when e no make you feel good, make we no surprise or lose courage.ย We must see those moments as chances to give our hearts more completely and without seeking anything for ourselves.
When you dey give yourself every day with
sacrifice, especially to people wey you and them share spiritual โfriendshipโ in Christ, you go begin see say the mercy wey you dey show them dey give them life deeply and dey sustain that life.ย To share mercy with another person get power to raise you enter life wey full of glory in Christ.ย As you dey do this and dey allow God mercy flow through you, His mercy dey first flow enter your own soul.ย To receive mercy and then become instrument wey God dey use show mercy dey fill us with deep satisfaction for life.ย Make this your aim every day.ย Among the people wey you and them don reconcile, look for chances to give your life without holding anything back.ย If you do so, you go see say the mercy wey you dey receive from God and share with others no go get limit.ย You go also see say to live with this kind mercy na the quickest way to follow the road to true holiness.
As we talk for the beginning of this section, โNothing dey for this earth wey person suppose value pass true friendshipโ (St. Thomas Aquinas).ย And when that friendship enter deep inside God mercy, people dey experience the Fruits of the Spirit inside am.ย The joy dey great, and the strength wey both people dey receive from that friendship dey make every sacrifice of love worth making.ย Try make all your friendships full of glory like this, especially your family relationships, and God go dey very much alive for your life, dey come to you and dey work through you for the lives of the people wey you love.
The Road to Holiness โ Summary of the Great Calling Wey We Get
This short book give us reflections on three virtues wey dey very important for person to become holy.ย All three dey necessary, because each one dey build on the other.ย But the final result of life wey we dey humble, dey trust and dey show mercy na life wey dey give person deep fulfilment, and wey still dey make very great difference for other people lives.ย
When we live holy life and finally give ourselves with sacrifice, the result na happiness wey words no fit describe, because as we reach the highest point of giving ourselves out of mercy, we dey enter deep union with God.
Ch. 5 – Living Sacrifice of Love
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